TOP COMMENTS FROM VIDEO BELOW
In my late 50’s. Married 32 years to a girl I met when she was 16 and I was 18. No infidelities. No divorces. 3 grown daughters. I consider myself “happily married” but it certainly wasn’t always happy/perfect. We stuck it out through the difficult times, we never wanted to hurt each other intentionally. We never confused “being in love” with “being happy”.
Happiness is a fleeting feeling, you can be happy, unhappy, sad, angry, etc over the course of a single day. Even when we were not “happy” for an extended period, we both admit that we still “loved” each other and wanted things to get better. Don’t get obsessed with how “happy” you are (or or not).
A shared Faith and belief in our vows. That was our core.
I called the 30’s-40’s “The Hump”…when the kids are most demanding, when money was tightest, when we were too tired, anxious, busy to treat each other the way we each deserved to be treated. When the most temptation to stray happened….if you can get past “The Hump” without doing anything you can’t forgive each other for….things will get better. Hang on.
One of the biggest hurdles we all face as married people…the decline in sex…is the biggest issue for men when going over “The Hump”. In that mix is hormonal birth control, which was a BIG factor for my wife. All you young married folks…be aware. The whole “she needs you to be X (romantic/loving/etc)” to have sex and “you need sex to feel romantic/loving/etc toward her…vs resentful that she hasn’t touched you in weeks” is a THING. You need to talk about it, schedule it, do something about it or it will eat your relationship alive.
I still love my wife now as much as I did when she was my beautiful 20-something yo bride. It’s been as close to a “Storybook Romance” as reality can provide. But it was absolutely NOT a “Happily Ever After” story. Western media…especially romance/rom-com’s…has been a HUGE problem for our society IMO.
Make good choices.
Marry for the right reasons.
Commit. Be Faithful. Persevere.
Matt thank you for letting James talk without cutting him off like so many other hosts do.
